view member journals

 

Search All Journals

    
  • View users with: Most entries, Most viewed, Most commented
  • Most popular tags: Zdigitizing(99), travel(46), education(41), love(40), writing(32),  ...more
    • You searched for: Gender: Female
        lmm27295  45, Female, USA - 15 entries
    09
    Oct 2006
    8:37 AM EDT
       

    Well, it was another weekend of me wanting to put a gun to my head. We had T this weekend. Sat. I went wedding shopping with my mom and realized something. My best friend J was engaged onced and she would tell me stories of how when she went wedding shopping she would get sick. She said she would feel sick on her stomach. She felt like the marriage she was getting ready to go through was all wrong and at the end, he left her and they never got married. I realized this weekend I am having those same feelings. I felt so sick on Sat when went to Concord and it did not help any that we got into it when I was trying to WEDDING SHOP. Its not that I don't love him or want to marry him its just that things are so bad that I am so scard to do it. We fight all the time and I am so miserable. We got into on Sat. and he talked to me like total s*** infront of Tyler, over the ph. I was so pissed, but in his eyes he does nothing wrong. Oh, and ofcorse, I was over reacting b/c of my period. He said I'm sorry on Sunday after we went to church and we went and took T home from church he told his "grammie" how he wanted to go to the church again. She said she would take him. I am not going to church with her. The only reason why we went in the first place was so B can look good to his father. We have not went to church in forever, and all of a sudden B's dad has been taken his parents to church so B feels the need to go. Kind of funny he only wants to go when his dad is going, plus it is in A. And one of the reasons we moved to L was to get away from's B's ex and now he wants to go to church w/ them???? Makes no damn sense. On the way home we stopped by to see K and the baby in the hosp. and when we were leaving B asked me if I wanted a baby and I told him no, not right now. I told him we could not afford one right now. He got so pissed telling me it was fine w/ him not to have kids and that he did not ant to put $ into another child. and accused me of not wanting kids which I never said!! I just said not now b/c I am not ready. He told me that there was no reason for us to wait to have s**. Which has nothing to do w/ why we are waiting. He said "why wait, not like there is anything else special." Another reason is why would I want to bring a child into a bad situation. A situation like we are in right now where we cannot even get along. It would be the same thing as R&C. 2 fighting parents. Things have been so bad between us that I don't have those kind of "lovie" feelings anymore. They are gone. I am so hurt and have no clue of what I did wrong. I cannot take this anymore, I am so miserable at work and it is to the pt I hate even getting out of the bed. He doesn't want to try or make things work b/c he would not contuie acting this why. I told him Sat. night that I am not trying anymore, I really feel like giving up.
     Add comment
    Add Comment:

    Add Tags:
    To add multiple tags, please separate them with comma ( , )


    View all posts

        jleigh09  39, Female, United Kingdom - 35 entries
    09
    Oct 2006
    10:47 PM WEDT
       

    feel really low today hate myself right now i feel low bout my weight since having tyler. i know im not huge or even fat i just am bigger then before. i dont think steven is as attracted to me as he used to be. i'm so scared of loosing him. i feel so down i just wanna cry. Mt mates russ and ali got engaged he proposed to her yesterday they have only been togeather 7 months steven will never marry me he doent wanna ever get maried i dunno does he want a future with me i just dont know.
     Add comment
    Add Comment:

    Add Tags:
    To add multiple tags, please separate them with comma ( , )


    View all posts

        retirik  58, Female, Illinois, USA - 36 entries
    09
    Oct 2006
    4:19 AM CDT
       

    Сегодня праздник, День Колумба, школы закрыты. Утро. Ребешка смотрит детскую передачу и играет с куклой. Где-то через час должна позвонить Оля. Сегодня они с Настей и Ваней приезжают в Чикаго на прием к врачу - у Вани проблема с ушами. Если врач успокоит Олю и скажет, что ничего серьезного нет, то она позвонит нам и мы где-нибудь встретимся, чтобы дети поиграли.
     Add comment
    Add Comment:

    Add Tags:
    To add multiple tags, please separate them with comma ( , )


    View all posts

        eveycan2  49, Female, Illinois, USA - 5 entries
    09
    Oct 2006
    3:12 PM CDT
       

    havnt been expressing my thought's hear lately but it has been an interseting few weeks, I almost wish I could meet someone who can forfill the emptyness ive been experiencing with my man. I went out to a local bar with somne friends and ran into a guy who i grew up with as a child....my my my has he grown into a man. A hot handsome man. It's interseting how all I could think about was my man, and how I wouldnt want him to cheat on me so I cut him short really fast and let him know I had a man. I havn't been spending much time here at home. Ive been out everyday with my girlfriend cause im tired of waiting at home for my man to come home. My man is still a jerk but trying to be home a litttle more. we actually had a serious conversation last week about breaking up, it's so easy to get over someone when there is someone else in your life to fill that void, so he's obviously cheeting, or he really just dont care. well thats all for now....
     Add comment
    Add Comment:

    Add Tags:
    To add multiple tags, please separate them with comma ( , )


    View all posts

        Mzmoss03987  33, Female, Ohio, USA - 6 entries
    09
    Oct 2006
    3:32 PM EDT
       

    Today was alright i guess. i ahd fun at school but im very tired of english. My friends are normal friends and they are cool. I know who are my real friends and who are not. I would name a few but this is public so i won't be mean. people in school are stuck up and phony. Follower and copies. Im not like that at all but im still real. People calling either names because of how they look and sound and appear to other peopel. Like being big, thick, short hair, short or tall. it really should not even matter but people will be people. very harsh people. well i've got to go type to ya 2morrow. Lata!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
     Add comment
    Add Comment:

    Add Tags:
    To add multiple tags, please separate them with comma ( , )


    View all posts

        99tracy99  41, Female, Hong Kong SAR - 33 entries
    10
    Oct 2006
    2:58 AM AWST
       

    嚇人 Monday, October 09, 2006 我以為咩事添, 有個fd 同我講話呢個blog 勁唔stable 有時入唔到 我估可能network 問題 因為多年來發現最唔stable 可能係東歐d網, 好多時都network jam 慢到死,反而我呢個blog 係美國網 相對黎講 好用d啦 不過我都會轉,... 因為呢個網係好難search,不過....... 唔支援中文law.成日出怪獸字 唉...都唔知點解會咁,可能唔係英文係會差d anyway,個人認為香港人真係好鍾意寫blog 或者呢個就係大都會生活下o既煩惱： 多野做壓力大心力交瘁成日抑鬱一個唔該就做左下一隻紅衣女鬼然後............ 無謂講,太辛酸 換個話題,可能我唔係成日on9 好多人都搵唔到我,so 呢期耳根清靜好多 唔使下下應酬一d好騎呢o既人 唔知係我老定咩,真係唔係好鍾意d 女仔講手機好似同你hea 咁,仲話自己有成幾千分鐘..... 但係你真係好覺係hea + 勁dead air =浪費時間 又或者人到左 2 字頭 好多野唔同左 好似d時間快過好多 或者係咁先覺得d後生waste time law 唔講la~~灰死
     Add comment
    Add Comment:

    Add Tags:
    To add multiple tags, please separate them with comma ( , )


    View all posts

        99tracy99  41, Female, Hong Kong SAR - 33 entries
    10
    Oct 2006
    2:55 AM AWST
       

    唔好意思，唔記得．．．． Friday, June 02, 2006 老實講,呢期成日追股,買完中行買招行,跟住...有冇新股? 我真係冇咩心水,至於另一個網o既stock ,我見自己多錢得滯,咪玩下,冇野gei...有錢人就係咁架啦~~~hahaha 講完咁多....呢期都係咁悶,返工放工,唉...原來做人搵啖飯都係咁,搵得多又係咁做,搵得少又係咁...都唔知可以有咩轉機 唔講呢d野啦,講得多仲唉得多...仲無謂 好啦~~講下o黎緊馬季完左,有咩搞....唔好以為我會好忙呀,完左馬季我仲得閑,馬會簽左好多contract員工,完左馬季隨時得幾百落袋..都幾淒涼,so 如果可以架話就搵多份part time,做多d呀嘛~~~ (14/7/06 EDIT: 有D錢O既....不過2~3K law...冇幾百咁慘)
     Add comment
    Add Comment:

    Add Tags:
    To add multiple tags, please separate them with comma ( , )


    View all posts

        99tracy99  41, Female, Hong Kong SAR - 33 entries
    10
    Oct 2006
    2:54 AM AWST
       

    有情人最終決定 唔.....唔搵啦 決定左唔搵番個 有同冇其實冇咩分別,有個人反而綁住哂,想去邊做咩都要問過人,好唔自在。 個人響你身邊又唔係好想見到佢, 唔響啦,又掛住哂 仲慘過痴線,如果係咁,痴線幸福d啦~~起碼仲有屋企人肯抵得諗照顧下,又有靚仔醫生俾我睇,點算呢...越諗...越想做傻仔,橫掂全香港1/4人口都有病,多我一個唔多少我一個唔少咁啦~~~~ 唉~~~講咁多~~~都係想唔搵番個,做d自己想做o既o野,唔駛下下俾人問長問短...
     Add comment
    Add Comment:

    Add Tags:
    To add multiple tags, please separate them with comma ( , )


    View all posts

        Dudley08  33, Female, Canada - First entry!
    09
    Oct 2006
    1:06 PM EDT
       

    Heyy everyone. Well today was pretty boring. I got mad at my sisters today bc they were being idiots. This weekend I had a friend over and I got to talk to all my friends. Umm...next weekend my parents are going to wedding and I only have a 4 day week at school:)
     Add comment
    Add Comment:

    Add Tags:
    To add multiple tags, please separate them with comma ( , )



        lmm27295  45, Female, Ohio, USA - 15 entries
    09
    Oct 2006
    12:32 PM EDT
       

    B just called and he acted pissed. He got home from work. He asked if I had check my oil yet b/c it seems to be leaking very bad and I told him no that I don't know how and he said yes you do. I told him that I really didn't and he said fine, I will show you. Heaven forbid he help me check it. I am so sick of his s***. going to make me check my own oil. My father changes my oil. My own boyfriend don't and he loves to use the excuse that he doesn't have a place to do it when my parents live 2 miles down the rd w/ a big back yard. Its really kind of funny. So then he brings up that he found were I had written on the foam on the garg. doors months ago. We were out there working on it late one night and I wrote B loves L. I thought it would be sweet and incase we ever move out it would still be there. Well, he calls me a bit ago all pissed b/c I put his name first instead of writing L loves B. I meant nothing by it. I was trying to do something sweet and he just reunied it. I wish I would have never done it now. I regret writing it. How ungrateful can you be. I meant nothing by it. He said "you always wright my name 1st." I just thought I would put his name 1st. It was so harmless. So he got off the ph and did not even tell me that he loved. Oh, I guess that I have committed such a sin that I am going to hell.
     Add comment
    Add Comment:

    Add Tags:
    To add multiple tags, please separate them with comma ( , )


    View all posts

    Matches: 14994 ... 1051 | 1052 | 1053 | 1054 | 1055 | 1056 | 1057 | 1058 | 1059 | 1060 ... Next Prev Last